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This very well may be the most important post on this site; past or future. While many sites out there, including this one, strive to give creative and constructive gift ideas, it all really boils down to the individual’s taste. Knowing that I can not be everything to everyone, I put together an advice piece to assist every person that is having trouble finding a gift for a hard-to-buy-for man. Therefore, I’m pleased to present to you The Men’s Gift Guide Golden Rules.
What this is and what it is not
This is not a specific list. In fact, not one product is mentioned. However, this is meant to be a general list of guidelines to assist in the men’s gift-giving world. It gives insight to the man’s psyche and should help you determine if what you are thinking about giving him will be a good fit.
Bottom line: if you are considering a specific gift for him, but aren’t sure, check these rules. If you can apply any one rule, it may be a good choice. More than one; you have a good chance of that being a great gift.
Rule 1: Don’t Believe Him
Absolutely first and foremost; never ever believe him when he says that he doesn’t want anything, has everything he needs, or he doesn’t care. Men look forward to the excitement and anticipation of getting gifts just as much as anyone else. The true answer to the question, “what do you want for…” is more likely, “I don’t know, I can’t think of anything, or it’s silly and I don’t want to tell you.” Men are supposed to be providers of the family and sometimes have a hard time saying “buy this for me.” All this means that it’s going to take a little more detective work for you. But, that’s what the rest of this article is about. One last note, don’t nag him about it. Constant pressure to tell you what he wants will only make his brain shut down further.
Rule 2: Something to Play With
Deep down, men are just big kids. They like to fix, tinker, assemble, and figure out. Some of the most miserable holidays I can remember have been when I just got clothes. I always need something to play with that day. There are numerous companies out there that have made it big just by selling “big boy’s toys.” What else could explain the continued popularity of high end video game systems and high stakes poker? While some women enjoy these things also, any marketer will tell you that men continue to be the driving force behind many gadget, gaming, and “stuff to play with” industries. Chances are he works hard, day in and day out. So give him something to play with. It just may be the perfect gift.
Rule 3: Appeal to His Past
Have you ever heard him say, “I used to have one of these when I was a kid?” Does he play with the kids toys more than the kids do? My guess is yes to both. Remember, he’s just a big kid at heart (see Rule 2). Men love to remember the carefree days when they had less responsibility and could just do what they wanted. So get on an auction site and find that vintage lunch box or action hero that he used to play with. Let him share with his kids something he played with when he was a kid.
Rule 4: Make him say wow and give him something to show off.
Originally, these were going to be two separate rules. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that making him say “wow” or “neat” is the same as making his friends say “wow” or “neat.” Gifts don’t always have to be practical or needed. Men simply like “cool stuff.” Then they like to show other men their “cool stuff”. Why do you think that new cars and lawn mowers are like man magnets? Let him be the envy of his friends by “wow-ing” them all with your super cool gift.
Rule 5: Give him stuff for his space
Every man needs a space in the house that is his, be it an office, garage, game room, basement, wherever. This is a room where he can decorate any way he wants, keep anything he wants in it. I have stuff from my favorite sports team, a fish tank, gumball machine, and an antique cash register in mine. So, if your man doesn’t have a space like this, GIVE HIM ONE. Then give him stuff he likes to go in the room. Remember you can still have control over the whole rest of the house.
Rule 6: Challenge Him
Men love a challenge. We have an inherent need to prove we are the biggest, the strongest, the smartest, the fastest, and the best darn Barbie house put-together-er on the block. So give us something to test our brains and our skills. Give us something to assemble, or solve. Then, ooh and aah when we come and show you our accomplishment.
Rule 7: Take Him Somewhere
This needs to be somewhere that’s just for him; his favorite restaurant, sporting event, or monster-truck rally. Take him on that trip that he’s always wanted, but never found the time for. He’ll know that it isn’t somewhere you really wanted to go and he’ll appreciate what you’ve done for him.
Rule 8: Give Manly Things
Deep inside, we’re all still men. And eons of history can’t really change who we are at our core. Give him something that reminds him of being a man. Words like wood, leather, rustic, and vintage come to mind. Perhaps classic, gallant, or daring. What images come to mind when you read these words? Now associate it with your man, and get crackin’.
Rule 9: Consider doing, rather than giving
Not all gifts are material things. And, yes, maybe he really doesn’t need anything. Well a gesture just for him might be the ticket. I once read an article about a guy who was just head-over-heels for his girlfriend because she got him a carwash and detail for his birthday. He never would have gotten it for himself, but loved that she did it for him. I also knew a lady who invited all his friends over for a poker game, and she served food, beer, and cigars all night. Easy, simple things that’ll show him more than you’ll ever know.
Rule 10: If you truly don’t know what you’re doing, then don’t
As mentioned in Rule 1, men may very well have a specific thing in mind, but are just too embarrassed or shy to tell you what it is. Going out and getting something totally wrong may disappoint both of you, as men tend to be very specific about what they want (“this is what I wanted; I just wanted the other model”). While it is the thought that counts, it may be even better to say “I know you wanted that video game, but I wasn’t sure which one. Let’s go and buy it together.” This is also the perfect time to use the ace up your sleeve, the store gift card. However, make sure it is to a specific store. That way he’s got to use it for his gift, and it can’t be squandered away for groceries and gasoline.
What else?
What did I miss? What can you add? Which rule is the most important? Be sure to post your thoughts so we can continue to improve this list.
July 23rd, 2007 at 3:36 pm
[...] -I used to love playing with dominoes as a kid. Check these out from Coolest Gadgets. Satisfies Men’s Gifts Rules 2 and 3. -Nothing like a cool little gadget to do a simple task. Geek Alerts. -The ice cubes of the future! Gizmo Central. -More super cool wedding rings. Neatorama. -Dude, this sofa totally looks like a pool! Crib Candy. -The “Make a decision already” Watch. Gizmodo. -Here’s a useful little gadget to seal up soda cans. Uber-Review. -I love the look of this cocktail shaker. Acquire Magazine. -Help. I need a gadget to assist in sliding a beer down the bar. Problem Solved. Nerd Approved. -A green powered chain saw? Boing Boing. -For those days when he just can’t take it anymore. Your Next Gift. [...]
July 25th, 2007 at 4:34 am
[...] Ten Rules for Choosing Gifts for Men posted at The Mens Gift Guide. [...]
August 28th, 2007 at 3:23 pm
[...] The LEGO is 75 years old! Really? I can 100% guarantee this, your guy remembers playing with LEGOs as a kid. He may still play with his kid’s LEGOs. Who knows? But like I’ve said before, getting him gifts that remind him of his childhood are always a hit (see men’s gifts rule #3). [...]
September 13th, 2007 at 6:01 pm
[...] Yes, we know he continues to get enjoyment out of his “tappa kegga” t-shirt. We all know which events he “survived” and which keggers he conquered. Seems like he got a t-shirt for EVERYTHING in college, doesn’t it? And of course, we men can not bear to part with anything like that (see Men’s Gift Rule #3). But, you are sick of seeing him wear them. It’s a husband and wife struggle that’s been going on for eons. So, turn them into something useful. [...]
September 27th, 2007 at 5:43 pm
[...] My point in telling you this is to reiterate gifts for men rules # 3 and 7. If your man relays to you some sad story such as this, use it to your advantage. Plan a trip to the planetarium so he can relive those memories of youth. It’s often very interesting where men hide their gift idea hints. You’ve just got to be on the lookout. [...]
October 15th, 2007 at 8:55 pm
[...] If you’re new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. That way, you can have new posts delivered right to you. Or click here to subscribe to The Men’s Gift Guide by Email Thanks for visiting! There is nothing, I mean nothing, more manly than the primal ability to build a fire to keep the family warm. The ability to conjure and control fire is arguably THE reason man was able to evolve. So, things for the fire place are excellent examples of gifts that satisfy men’s gift rule #8. [...]
October 25th, 2007 at 2:47 pm
[...] If you’re new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. That way, you can have new posts delivered right to you. Or click here to subscribe to The Men’s Gift Guide by Email Thanks for visiting! So it doesn’t look like Geekologie or Engadget like the idea of a wooden DIY keyboard. Personally, I think the idea is kind of intriguing. But lets look at it from our Rules For Giving Gifts To Men angle. [...]
November 2nd, 2007 at 10:25 pm
[...] Justin Consuegra presents Ten Rules for Choosing Gifts for Men posted at The Mens Gift Guide. [...]
November 15th, 2007 at 3:26 pm
[...] If you’re new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. That way, you can have new posts delivered right to you. Or click here to subscribe to The Men’s Gift Guide by Email Thanks for visiting! In great accordance with men’s gift rule #9, my wife once got me a massage at a local high end spa. Now I had never been to a spa before, but she enjoys it, and she thought it’d be something I could get used to. So we went together. Here’s something I didn’t know, when you get to the spa, they immediately give you a robe and slippers to change into. I guess they want you totally relaxed. So you change and wait in a little posh waiting room with everyone else for your turn. [...]
November 26th, 2007 at 3:11 am
[...] If you’re new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. That way, you can have new posts delivered right to you. Or click here to subscribe to The Men’s Gift Guide by Email Thanks for visiting!I used to love working puzzles. It’s a great challenge (see rule 6), plus it’s a great family activity. I’ve stopped recently because I just can’t afford to have an entire table consumed with puzzle pieces for however long it takes to get the thing together (sometimes weeks at my pace). My favorites are the mystery ones where you read a story, put the puzzle together, and then have to figure out the clues to solve the story. [...]